🧘🏻 Kintsugi - The art of embracing your flaws
This ancient Japanese art does not believe in concealing cracks and mistakes. It celebrates them, making the final art piece uniquely stunning.
We always seek to be the best version of ourselves by striving towards perfection. While it can be healthy and motivating to continuously reach higher, an overdose can often lead to stress and fatigue.
If you often hear others telling you to not be so hard on yourself, or if you start catching yourself avoiding new experiences due to a fear of failure, then it’s time to take a step back.
This is when the concept of kintsugi can be helpful.
Today’s newsletter is a tad pensive, but may be just what you need before the weekends come in tomorrow.
What is kintsugi
Kintsugi is an old Japanese art of fixing broken pottery by lining the cracks with a special tree sap lacquer with gold powder, and sometimes silver or platinum dust.
Instead of frantically trying to conceal the cracks like nothing happened, kintsugi honours and emphasises them.
Mistakes are celebrated, not covered up or shunned from.
After completing the repair works, the final product looks even more beautiful and striking than the original. Through the gold outlines, you can clearly see what the piece of pottery has went through, and how it has recovered.
Just let that sink in for a while.
A short history
Historians believe that kintsugi dates back to the late 15th century when Japanese shogun Ashikaga Yoshimasa sent a cracked chawan, or tea bowl, back to China for repairs.
When the tea bowl was sent back to him, the shogun was displeased to find that it had been mended with unsightly metal staples. This motivated craftsmen to seek an alternative, more aesthetically pleasing repair method.
By the 17th century, kintsugi became more popular and common in Japan. A Japanese warrior even infamously bought tea bowls to break and repair them for a profit.
When there’s a demand, supply will indeed find its way.
This mode of repair is said to be derived from the Japanese feeling of mottainai, which expresses regret when something is wasted, as well as mushin, which is the acceptance of change.
The story behind wabi sabi
Beyond looking pretty, kintsugi is a representation of philosophical ideas. It is related to the Japanese philosophy of wabi sabi, which calls for seeing beauty in imperfections. It cherishes the simple and unpretentious things, particularly if it has a rustic quality.
As you can imagine, wabi sabi isn’t a new phenomenon.
Sen no Rikyu (1522-99), a proponent of wabi sabi, was journeying through southern Japan when he was invited to dinner by a host. The host was very excited to meet Rikyu, and thought that he would be impressed by his elaborate-looking and expensive antique tea jar from China.
However, throughout the dinner, Rikyu barely noticed the existence of the prized tea jar. Instead, he was engaged in conversations with other guests and admiring a branch swaying in the breeze outdoors.
Devastated, the host smashed the jar to pieces the moment Rikyu took his leave.
Shocked, the other guests quickly picked up the pieces and tried sticking them back together. This was how kintsugi was rumoured to be born - because nice friends wanted to help out a friend who clearly has anger management issues.
Anyway, when Rikyu made his second visit, he looked at the repaired jar and beamed, exclaiming that it looks magnificent.
Incorporating kintsugi in your life
Thankfully, you can wire your brain to adopt the philosophy behind kintsugi.
First of all, embrace your flaws. Life sometimes suck, and bad things can come crashing down on you. If you’re down on luck, many bad things can rain on you when you’re feeling most vulnerable. These bad things are sometimes referred to as failures.
Failure, despite its negative connotations, is merely a stepping stone towards success.
Accepting that all these are a part of life is one way to overcome it. Forgive yourself and recognise that you can make mistakes. Don’t look at failure as a monster, or as something that you must avoid at all costs.
If it makes you feel better, open up about your failures with a trusted friend to get new perspectives. If you’re still uncomfortable, listen to a couple of TED talks on coping with failure. Whatever it is, stop bottling it all inside because we all need an outlet.
Many of us don’t understand that self-care is mandatory.
How you treat yourself on a daily basis matters. Appreciate the small things around you. Go on a stroll or a short hike. Practise gratitude and mindfulness, journal if it helps.
Whatever you do, just focus your energy on the things in life that actually matter and bring you joy and contentment.
Clock in some quiet time with yourself.
Turn off social media for a day as a form of detox if you have to. Do yoga, breathwork, or simply stare into space if you’d like. Take a nap, be unproductive and zone out. Allow your overworked mind to rest and drift.
You don’t always need to be doing something.
If you have been depriving yourself of these entitlements, it’s time to act on them because you decide how you want to spend your time.
Don’t let someone else’s success define yours.
To better incorporate kintsugi in your life, surround yourself with a loving community. Staying connected to a healthy circle of friends can be very reinvigorating in itself too.
Why not try new experiences together? Maybe consider signing up for a group floral arrangement workshop or that scary HIIT class that you’ve been meaning to for ages. How about organising a short reunion with old schoolmates?
Remember, scars are precious.
Don’t be ashamed of your history and what you’ve gone through. As cheesy as it sounds, you are an amalgamation of your mistakes.
You are who you are today because of what you’ve done. Instead of erasing these cracks like how you’re used to, why not celebrate them?
Know of someone who may need to hear all these? Why not share the article with them?